Monday, August 17, 2009

RED AND BLUE......


She was waiting for him, whole day.It was a winter morning...a little cloudy and foggy, it was cold, silent and serene. But still it depends upon your mood how you utilize and feel this weather. If you are happy, if you are peaceful it will be a nice, romantic weather for you.But if you are mentally disturbed, feeling hopeless, aimless and loveless it will appear to you as deadly silent.

She was standing there alone since early morning. Every second was like an hour...and gradually seconds passed, minutes passed and hours passed. Brightness of the day soon began to fade and slowly but silently darkness was immersing the universe. But there was darkness in her mind too and with each passing hour it only darkened with despair and hopelessness. The Wind was too cold for her to bear, still she stood there with her rock solid stubbornness and dedication and no one could move her. She was shivering... not due to coldness of the night. she was so angry..she was feeling deceived ,she was feeling humiliated and there was too much pain in her heart.....as if it was being torn apart!!! and she could do nothing...she was helpless...no one came to meet her, she was left behind!

Suddenly she realised it was 9.30pm and there was not much people on the streets. Some of the passer-byes were throwing a piercing glance at her. Her cell was ringing and it was the 6 th call from her home. She didn’t care to pick it up and like the previous calls it enlisted its name as a "missed call”. Now she changed her mind and she wanted to go but she could not move...her hands were too cold as if she was dead...and her feet were numb. But somehow she managed to move...she walked and walked. Her vision was blurred...everything was so opaque in front of her ...her mouth was dry and cold but her eyes were wet ...warm teardrops rolled down her cheeks...She said to herself, " why did u do this to me!! I love you so so much...I gave you everything I had, not a single day has passed when I haven’t thought of you, I was always there for you, you are my life, my soul .my inspiration ..you are my everything..you are my God....and everything I do and want to do..is only for you!! Still you did this to me! am I too bad??? don’t I deserve a little happiness ,a little love!!"......

She was thinking about the day , they first talked. She was down with fever , couldn’t go to college and getting bored like hell. So she connected internet and went to a chat room and all those people who has experience of going to a chat room are surely aware of the fact that whenever they see a girl's id/name all of them just jump upon the id!! And soon her screen was flooded with thousands of boxes ..some of them offering friendship, some of them asking asl,and of course some of them.....u guess what!! She choose the most beautiful id..."bhorer akash" ,it appeared amazing to her, she was overwhelmed. And that was the moment, that special moment and after that they never looked back, everything went so smoothly, so imperceptively. Their friendship grew stronger and stronger with each passing day. They used to share their sorrows, their joys just like close friends. It was like a flow and they were flowing together without caring about anything or rather it can be said that they were so much involved with each other they just forgot about everything! They belonged to each other, they were incomplete without each other.

Gradually they came closer, they exchanged phone numbers and when they used to talk to each other, most of the time they never realised that hours have passed...and they enjoyed these astonishing moments after discovering how much they have talked. Everything was so heavenly so perfect that she often doubted whether she was awake...what if it is a dream!

After knowing him and becoming his friend each and every day was a pure bliss for her...she forgot all her worries. He was like a drug and she was addicted to him. Though he had never expressed any kind of feelings except friendship...she had devoted everything, her mind..her soul to him! She loved him deeply, with such intensity, passion and madness that it reached to the extent of obsession.

Now coming back to the present day. They had fixed a casual dating and it was decided that he will wear a black sweater and she, a purple dress. The time and the venue everything was fixed. Though they were friends they never saw each other and she was bubbling with enthusiasm and waiting eagerly with butterflies in her stomach! But she waited patiently whole day....he did not come. She called him at least 20 times but he did not receive the phone calls and last time she called it was switched off. She stood there speechless...agonized and traumatized by unbearable pain and anger. With every passing hour her hope faded in the mist of uncertainty .She was petrified and did not understand anything....at last she went home.

But you know what!! actually he came...yes he came to meet her. But she did not recognise him as he was wearing a blue sweater ! He came, he saw her and he passed across her...without giving her any hints that it was him! he was just like other strangers .Well...his expectations were quite high...and she, or rather it can be said her ordinary, simple, middle-class looks failed to charm him and she failed miserably to fulfill his expectations! He deceived her. He left her behind. He played with her emotions and left her with a broken heart and grieving soul. And after that day he did not ever receive her calls and one day he changed his number, he changed his id and he was gone! he vanished himself! and it was just like that! so much easy for him.

But she is still expecting that one day he will call...one day he will love her, care for her just like she does everyday, every single moment. She still wonders what her fault was. She does not know anything...she is just a stupid, emotional, ordinary girl! She tried her best to hate him, forget him but how can she! Her heart, her soul, her mind belongs to him...he is her God! And this is the reality, weird reality...a stranger became friend then more than a friend and then again a stranger!! And the process was too fast for her to cope with.

Well...I haven’t mentioned the names...right??? ...but still what is there in a name! Every day someone is being deceived, dumped! who cares!! NO ONE...this is a big selfish world! Everyone is alone here, living with a heart that craves for a little love, care and support. Loving someone truly gives you courage and being loved by someone gives you strength. So...keep loving, unconditionally and genuinely .BE AN ANGEL ... :)

“ Someday you will cry for me,

Like I cried for you...

Someday you will miss me,

Like I missed you...

Someday you will need me,

Like I needed you...

Someday you will love me,

But I wont love you!!!!”

..................................................................................


5 comments:

Unknown said...

the feelings of the girl were described in a very touching way... i appreciate ...

RESHMI said...

thnk u :)

Unknown said...

touching n realistic.........

RESHMI said...

thank u gunjan:)

Ritayan said...

like the idea and the sensitivity with which it was dealt with.